Birth Trauma Confessions: Why My Emergency Birth Was My Most Healing

I have four beautiful children. My first 3 births were non-emergency, but very traumatic for me. I sustained injuries from my birth. Doctors weren’t present for two of my births. Obstetricians ignored my health concerns and disrespected me throughout my prenatal care visits. Nurses pushed interventions I did not want. I had trouble recovering and nursing, and had very little support. These situations were not ideal, and led me to research alternative options for maternity care when I became pregnant with my 4th child; My husband and I decided on an out of hospital midwife for prenatal care.

My pregnancy

My pregnancy progressed without complication! I was very healthy and nearing the end of the third trimester. I noticed while I was caring for my other children that I was getting  dizzy, light-headed, and nervous. I called my midwife, and she said that it was probably a blood sugar issue and that I should rest and continue to eat well.

Complications Arise

Two days later I couldn’t sleep! I was having light contractions at about 3 am, and figured I would try to take a shower to get them to slow down. As I was getting ready, my water broke; it was clear that something was very wrong. I called my midwife to tell her that there was an unsightly amount of blood when my water broke. Fearing a placenta problem, my midwife suggested that I leave by ambulance to a hospital.

While riding to the hospital with the EMTs, I resigned myself to the fact that either my baby was dead, or that she was alive and I would need to have an emergency cesarean.

My hospital Experience

When I got to the hospital the nurses hooked my up to contraction and fetal heart tone monitors. The baby was fine and healthy! I Explained to the on call obstetrician that I was a homebirth transfer mom. She understood my desire to have a low intervention birth, and explained that I would be able to have a natural birth unless the baby went into distress. The OB also explained that the reason for the blood in the water was because of a suspected partial placental abruption.

My husband arrived at the hospital about an hour later, and I was already in a delivery/labor room! He was the most awesome support person in the world! We had talked a lot during this pregnancy about my expectations for him. I felt like during my previous labors he was absent. He didn’t really understand what I needed or how to support me, because we never communicated about it.

My husband was a knight in shining armor. A rock. A constant. A beautiful person, and support for me.

My labor was progressing quickly. I had to have continuous fetal monitoring, and frequently nurses and doctors came in to check on me. Not once did any of the medical staff disturb me, offer me pain medication, or force a cervical examination. My daughter was born a total of 4 and 1/2 hours after my water initially broke. Upon inspection of the placenta, it was found to have been abrupted by 40%.

Respect Birth

Although this was a scary and uncertain situation for me, this was not a traumatic situation! I was treated like an adult and given respect and information during my labor at the hospital. My wishes for care for my baby and I were well-respected, and I had an overall satisfactory time in the hospital!

Emergency doesn’t always mean trauma! I believe that even bad situations can be made easier to deal with if mothers and families are treated with respect during labor and birth. We can avoid birth trauma by supporting families and making transitions as easy as possible. Respect birth! Respect moms! Respect babies! Moving towards a culture of respect especially in obstetric care will help families recover and bond better with their babies.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Brittany started her journey of helping women in 2012, as a pregnancy consultant. She was certified as a Birth and Bereavement Doula through Stillbirthday in 2015 and gained certification as a Gena Kirby Rebozo Doula later that year. She is the Birth Doula for modern women. She is intuitive and open-minded; she is attentive and ready to support everyone. Brittany received over 800 hours of advanced training in the practice of massage therapy in her quest as a healer, and is continually researching and attending training in the art of holistic health and wellness. She volunteers with the Oklahoma Birth Trauma Support Group for mothers and families who have experienced birth trauma and pregnancy loss. She lives in Oklahoma City with her husband and four children.

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